LEap In to a conversation

These scenarios are designed to help you practise the LEAP IN model.

Each example explores a real issue that can provoke strong opinions and emotional reactions. To make these exercises meaningful, the examples include well-reasoned and clearly expressed versions of opposing viewpoints. In some cases, these arguments may sound more balanced or articulate than you might encounter in real life — that’s intentional. The goal is to give you the chance to engage with a strong version of a perspective you might disagree with, while practising how to stay calm, curious, and connected in conversation

LEAP IN is designed to be used in a wide range of real-world situations — including when people are being blunt, defensive, or emotionally charged. The skills you’re learning here — listening, empathising, asking questions, and responding from shared values — can help keep dialogue open and respectful, even when conversations become challenging.

An important note: In this quiz, we are looking for the best of the alternatives given. Some responses might be reasonable things to say, but one choice is usually the most skillful option for that moment in the conversation. Focus on whether the response reflects good LEAP IN communication skills — rather than whether you personally agree with it. For example, if an answer begins with “I can see that we both value…” remember it’s attempting to use a communication skill (naming shared values), even if you don’t personally share that view.

Context:

At a family gathering, the TV is on in the background playing a live debate show. A guest on the panel argues that more needs to be done to stop migrants crossing the English Channel illegally in small boats, describing the situation as “out of control.” Your cousin, who is very sympathetic to refugees, frowns at the mention of stricter border enforcement and says:

“This is just so cruel. These people are risking everything to find safety, and we’re treating them like criminals. Most are fleeing war or persecution, not looking for handouts. Instead of helping, we’re spending millions trying to push them away. I just don’t understand how anyone can see families in those boats and think punishment is the answer. What frustrates me most is how politicians and the media keep blowing this up like it’s the country’s biggest problem. It’s not — and going on and on about it like this is just fuelling fear and division, and it ends up hurting minority communities who already face prejudice. It feels like compassion has completely gone out of fashion.”

PART 1

Your cousin is upset at the mention of stricter border enforcement given the impact this will have on migrants. What is the best listening/empathetic response to start?

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A. “But not everyone crossing illegally is fleeing for their lives. Many come from countries that are considered safe or have already passed through safe nations, which makes their claims less clear-cut.”

B. “It sounds like you’re really upset by how people in those small boats are being treated — like we’re punishing people who are just trying to find safety. You feel the government and media are focusing on the wrong things, and that all this fear and hostility is making life harder for refugees and minority communities.”

C. “Are you saying we should allow everyone who arrives to stay, even if that means overwhelming housing and services that are already under pressure?”

D. “I just think laws have to mean something. If people enter illegally when there are legal routes available, it undermines fairness for those who follow the rules.”


Not quite. Answer B is best.

Response B paraphrases and empathises by reflecting not just your cousin’s feelings but the deeper concerns behind them. This kind of response shows that you’ve truly listened and understood what matters most to her. In LEAP IN, the first step is Listen/Empathise — to build trust and emotional safety, not to correct or counter. By choosing B, you show genuine curiosity and care, creating the foundation for an open, values-based conversation across difference.


Correct - Answer B is best.

Response B paraphrases and empathises by reflecting not just your cousin’s feelings but the deeper concerns behind them. This kind of response shows that you’ve truly listened and understood what matters most to her. In LEAP IN, the first step is Listen/Empathise — to build trust and emotional safety, not to correct or counter. By choosing B, you show genuine curiosity and care, creating the foundation for an open, values-based conversation across difference.


Not quite. Answer B is best.

Response B paraphrases and empathises by reflecting not just your cousin’s feelings but the deeper concerns behind them. This kind of response shows that you’ve truly listened and understood what matters most to her. In LEAP IN, the first step is Listen/Empathise — to build trust and emotional safety, not to correct or counter. By choosing B, you show genuine curiosity and care, creating the foundation for an open, values-based conversation across difference.


Not quite. Answer B is best.

Response B paraphrases and empathises by reflecting not just your cousin’s feelings but the deeper concerns behind them. This kind of response shows that you’ve truly listened and understood what matters most to her. In LEAP IN, the first step is Listen/Empathise — to build trust and emotional safety, not to correct or counter. By choosing B, you show genuine curiosity and care, creating the foundation for an open, values-based conversation across difference.

PART 2

Your cousin nods and continues passionately: “Exactly. These people risk everything to come here, and instead of showing compassion, we treat them like a threat. It’s dangerous and irresponsible the way the media keeps focusing on this issue — they play on people’s fears and make communities turn against each other. You can already see how it’s fuelling the far right and giving extremists something to feed on. Politicians know this, but they keep doing it because it wins them votes. It’s not just unfair, it’s reckless. Every time the headlines scream about ‘small boats’ or an ‘invasion’, it makes ordinary people more fearful and angry, and that just pushes the country further apart. I honestly think the way we talk about this issue is doing more damage than the issue itself.”

You’ve listened. What is your best open question now?

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A. “I’m interested in what concerns you most about the way we talk about the issue of illegal immigration?”

B. “But we’re already taking in tens of thousands of people each year, and housing and services are stretched thin. Isn’t it reasonable to set limits so the system doesn’t collapse?”

C. “Millions of working people here are struggling with low wages and overcrowded housing - that’s why people are so angry - not because they are talking about small boats on the news - but because the government isn’t doing anything to address the real issues with our immigration system. Don’t we have a duty to look after our own people, too?”

D. “I disagree. It’s a real problem and it impacts illegal migrants as well as UK citizens. Some experts say that instead of encouraging dangerous journeys, it’s fairer and safer to focus aid in refugee camps and nearby countries rather than bringing more people here.”


Correct - Answer A is best.

A is best. It asks an open, non-judgmental question that shows genuine curiosity about your cousin’s deeper worries and values. By saying, “What concerns you most…”, you invite her to explain what drives her feelings,  without interrupting or arguing. This reflects the Ask step in LEAP IN: staying open to understanding before sharing your own view. Options B, C, and D, while all factually grounded, move too quickly into advocacy or argument. By choosing A, you stay in a position of curiosity and connection, keeping your cousin open to deeper dialogue rather than defensiveness.


Not quite. Answer A is best.

A is best. It asks an open, non-judgmental question that shows genuine curiosity about your cousin’s deeper worries and values. By saying, “What concerns you most…”, you invite her to explain what drives her feelings,  without interrupting or arguing. This reflects the Ask step in LEAP IN: staying open to understanding before sharing your own view. Options B, C, and D, while all factually grounded, move too quickly into advocacy or argument. By choosing A, you stay in a position of curiosity and connection, keeping your cousin open to deeper dialogue rather than defensiveness.


Not quite. Answer A is best.

A is best. It asks an open, non-judgmental question that shows genuine curiosity about your cousin’s deeper worries and values. By saying, “What concerns you most…”, you invite her to explain what drives her feelings,  without interrupting or arguing. This reflects the Ask step in LEAP IN: staying open to understanding before sharing your own view. Options B, C, and D, while all factually grounded, move too quickly into advocacy or argument. By choosing A, you stay in a position of curiosity and connection, keeping your cousin open to deeper dialogue rather than defensiveness.


Not quite. Answer A is best.

A is best. It asks an open, non-judgmental question that shows genuine curiosity about your cousin’s deeper worries and values. By saying, “What concerns you most…”, you invite her to explain what drives her feelings,  without interrupting or arguing. This reflects the Ask step in LEAP IN: staying open to understanding before sharing your own view. Options B, C, and D, while all factually grounded, move too quickly into advocacy or argument. By choosing A, you stay in a position of curiosity and connection, keeping your cousin open to deeper dialogue rather than defensiveness.

PART 3

You’ve listened, empathised, asked, and paraphrased — now it’s time to practice offering your input, making sure you use I-statements and name your shared values.

You start to respond. Which of these is the best first statement to name where you agree?

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A. “I’ll be honest with you: we can’t just let everyone in — the UK is already struggling with housing shortages and pressure on public services. We have to be realistic about what the country can handle.”

B. “I hear your compassion for refugees, but I think experience shows that when rules aren’t enforced, more people end up risking their lives to come illegally. Countries like Australia saw deaths at sea drop sharply after they tightened border controls. Tougher measures can actually save lives by stopping smugglers from exploiting desperate people and encouraging safer, legal routes instead.”

C. “I come at this as someone who really values law and order. When thousands arrive illegally each year, it undermines fairness for those who wait and apply properly. I think strong enforcement is essential.”

D. “It sounds like we both agree the immigration system should be safe, fair and humane. We both want what’s best for the country’s future and for all people to be treated with decency.”


Not quite. Answer D is best.

This statement begins by naming shared values — fairness, safety, humanity, and wanting the best for everyone. This reflects the Name step of LEAP IN which focuses on connection before perspective. By highlighting mutual concerns (“fair” and “humane”), you show your cousin that you’re not dismissing her compassion, and that you care about decency too. This establishes trust and openness before you share your own view. Options A–C all present legitimate, fact-based arguments. However, all three skip the crucial LEAP IN step of finding connection first. They assert positions instead of acknowledging shared values or emotions, which risks closing down the dialogue. By choosing D, you build rapport and keep the focus on shared humanity — the foundation for a constructive, values-based conversation.


Not quite. Answer D is best.

This statement begins by naming shared values — fairness, safety, humanity, and wanting the best for everyone. This reflects the Name step of LEAP IN which focuses on connection before perspective. By highlighting mutual concerns (“fair” and “humane”), you show your cousin that you’re not dismissing her compassion, and that you care about decency too. This establishes trust and openness before you share your own view. Options A–C all present legitimate, fact-based arguments. However, all three skip the crucial LEAP IN step of finding connection first. They assert positions instead of acknowledging shared values or emotions, which risks closing down the dialogue. By choosing D, you build rapport and keep the focus on shared humanity — the foundation for a constructive, values-based conversation.


Not quite. Answer D is best.

This statement begins by naming shared values — fairness, safety, humanity, and wanting the best for everyone. This reflects the Name step of LEAP IN which focuses on connection before perspective. By highlighting mutual concerns (“fair” and “humane”), you show your cousin that you’re not dismissing her compassion, and that you care about decency too. This establishes trust and openness before you share your own view. Options A–C all present legitimate, fact-based arguments. However, all three skip the crucial LEAP IN step of finding connection first. They assert positions instead of acknowledging shared values or emotions, which risks closing down the dialogue. By choosing D, you build rapport and keep the focus on shared humanity — the foundation for a constructive, values-based conversation.


Correct - Answer D is best.

This statement begins by naming shared values — fairness, safety, humanity, and wanting the best for everyone. This reflects the Name step of LEAP IN which focuses on connection before perspective. By highlighting mutual concerns (“fair” and “humane”), you show your cousin that you’re not dismissing her compassion, and that you care about decency too. This establishes trust and openness before you share your own view. Options A–C all present legitimate, fact-based arguments. However, all three skip the crucial LEAP IN step of finding connection first. They assert positions instead of acknowledging shared values or emotions, which risks closing down the dialogue. By choosing D, you build rapport and keep the focus on shared humanity — the foundation for a constructive, values-based conversation.

PART 4

Having named your shared values, now it’s time to offer your input, making sure you use I-statements and that you ground what you say in the shared values you have identified. Which is the best way to do that respectfully?

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A. “These pro-immigration folks often ignore the reality that we can’t support unlimited arrivals. It’s not about being heartless — it’s about making sure our own communities don’t end up struggling even more.”

B. “We can’t have open borders. There’s already a housing crisis, the NHS is stretched, and schools are full. Wanting control isn’t cruel — it’s just common sense.”

C. “I agree with you that the atmosphere around immigration has become so heated that it’s making the country less safe — for asylum seekers and for UK citizens. I’d really like to see us change the way we talk about this issue. I want our country to work well for everyone, and that means I think we do still need to talk honestly about the challenges. From what I’ve seen, when people arrive in large numbers without proper systems in place, it can put real pressure on housing, schools, and healthcare, and that can make people feel anxious and unsafe. I think we need limits and clear legal routes so we can manage things fairly and calmly.”

D. “The numbers show that net migration has risen dramatically in recent years, and I think that’s created real pressure on services. If we don’t get tough now, we risk losing public trust completely.”


Not quite - Answer C is best.

Response C uses I-statements (“I agree…”, “I want…”, “I think…”) to express a personal, thoughtful viewpoint rather than an argument. It recognises your cousin’s concerns about compassion and safety while also naming the pressures that can arise when systems are overstretched. By grounding your view in shared values like fairness, safety, and care for everyone in the country, you show genuine empathy for both asylum seekers and local communities. This is a strong example of the Input and Name steps in LEAP IN: you offer your perspective honestly, link it to mutual values, and model a more balanced, humane way of talking about a polarising issue.


Not quite. Answer C is best.

Response C uses I-statements (“I agree…”, “I want…”, “I think…”) to express a personal, thoughtful viewpoint rather than an argument. It recognises your cousin’s concerns about compassion and safety while also naming the pressures that can arise when systems are overstretched. By grounding your view in shared values like fairness, safety, and care for everyone in the country, you show genuine empathy for both asylum seekers and local communities. This is a strong example of the Input and Name steps in LEAP IN: you offer your perspective honestly, link it to mutual values, and model a more balanced, humane way of talking about a polarising issue.


Correct - Answer C is best.

Response C uses I-statements (“I agree…”, “I want…”, “I think…”) to express a personal, thoughtful viewpoint rather than an argument. It recognises your cousin’s concerns about compassion and safety while also naming the pressures that can arise when systems are overstretched. By grounding your view in shared values like fairness, safety, and care for everyone in the country, you show genuine empathy for both asylum seekers and local communities. This is a strong example of the Input and Name steps in LEAP IN: you offer your perspective honestly, link it to mutual values, and model a more balanced, humane way of talking about a polarising issue.


Not quite. Answer C is best.

Response C uses I-statements (“I agree…”, “I want…”, “I think…”) to express a personal, thoughtful viewpoint rather than an argument. It recognises your cousin’s concerns about compassion and safety while also naming the pressures that can arise when systems are overstretched. By grounding your view in shared values like fairness, safety, and care for everyone in the country, you show genuine empathy for both asylum seekers and local communities. This is a strong example of the Input and Name steps in LEAP IN: you offer your perspective honestly, link it to mutual values, and model a more balanced, humane way of talking about a polarising issue.

PART 5

Your cousin responds: “I get what you’re saying, but I don’t think the problem is the people arriving; it’s the way the system is managed and how the issue’s been framed. The numbers are actually manageable compared to other countries, but we keep hearing that it’s ‘out of control,’ and that language just feeds panic. Honestly, I think the fear and hostility are doing more harm than migration itself. Most of these people just want to work, contribute, and live safely. If we invested properly in processing claims and integration instead of treating them like a threat, we’d reduce tension and make communities feel safer, not the other way around.”

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A. “That’s a nice idea in theory, but it completely ignores reality. We’ve tried being compassionate, and look where that’s got us — people still crossing in record numbers, massive issues with integration, and no one is doing anything to address it. At some point, we have to say enough is enough. It’s not fear or hostility — it’s common sense.”

B. “I agree with you that we need to approach this with humanity and make sure people are safe — that should apply to everyone, both those arriving here and those already living here. I also think there’s more behind the public anxiety than just media scaremongering. Even if the numbers are manageable overall, the pace of change can feel fast for some communities, especially where services are already stretched and there hasn’t been much support with housing or integration. When people feel unseen or insecure, fear starts to fill the gaps — not because they hate migrants, but because they feel forgotten. For me, a system that’s humane and well managed is the only way we can keep everyone safe and calm things down.”

C. “Actually, our system is managed — we already spend billions on asylum support and border patrols. The real issue isn’t management, it’s that too many people are arriving through unsafe routes. If anything, the language about being ‘out of control’ just reflects the situation on the ground.”

D. “I think people just need to be less emotional about this. Every country has limits, and pretending we can take everyone isn’t serious policymaking. I get that you care about compassion, but we can’t let feelings drive immigration policy — it has to be about control and fairness.”


Not quite. Answer B is best.

B begins by naming shared values — humanity and safety for everyone. By acknowledging that compassion must extend both to those seeking refuge and to people already living here, it builds trust and balance. The response then moves beyond blame to explore what’s really driving public fear: rapid change, overstretched services, and communities feeling ignored. This approach recognises legitimate anxieties without endorsing hostility. It’s a clear example of a LEAP IN— listening first, finding shared moral ground, and speaking with calm honesty rather than opposition.


Correct - Answer B is best.

B begins by naming shared values — humanity and safety for everyone. By acknowledging that compassion must extend both to those seeking refuge and to people already living here, it builds trust and balance. The response then moves beyond blame to explore what’s really driving public fear: rapid change, overstretched services, and communities feeling ignored. This approach recognises legitimate anxieties without endorsing hostility. It’s a clear example of a LEAP IN— listening first, finding shared moral ground, and speaking with calm honesty rather than opposition.


Not quite. Answer B is best.

B begins by naming shared values — humanity and safety for everyone. By acknowledging that compassion must extend both to those seeking refuge and to people already living here, it builds trust and balance. The response then moves beyond blame to explore what’s really driving public fear: rapid change, overstretched services, and communities feeling ignored. This approach recognises legitimate anxieties without endorsing hostility. It’s a clear example of a LEAP IN— listening first, finding shared moral ground, and speaking with calm honesty rather than opposition.


Not quite. Answer B is best.

B begins by naming shared values — humanity and safety for everyone. By acknowledging that compassion must extend both to those seeking refuge and to people already living here, it builds trust and balance. The response then moves beyond blame to explore what’s really driving public fear: rapid change, overstretched services, and communities feeling ignored. This approach recognises legitimate anxieties without endorsing hostility. It’s a clear example of a LEAP IN— listening first, finding shared moral ground, and speaking with calm honesty rather than opposition.

Listen

Give the speaker your full, undivided attention. Don’t interrupt or jump in with counter-arguments.

Emphasize

Acknowledge the other person’s feelings or point of view, even if you don’t agree. Say something that shows you understand how they feel.

Ask

Invite the other person to explain more. Use open-ended questions to learn what’s really on their mind.

ParaPhrase

After they speak, repeat back in your own words what you heard, to check understanding.

Input

When it’s your turn to speak, frame your thoughts in terms of your own experience and feelings, not as a judgment on the other person.

Name

Find and state something you both agree on. This might be a shared value, a mutual concern, or a common goal.

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