LEap In to a conversation

These scenarios are designed to help you practise the LEAP IN model.

Each example explores a real issue that can provoke strong opinions and emotional reactions. To make these exercises meaningful, the examples include well-reasoned and clearly expressed versions of opposing viewpoints. In some cases, these arguments may sound more balanced or articulate than you might encounter in real life — that’s intentional. The goal is to give you the chance to engage with a strong version of a perspective you might disagree with, while practising how to stay calm, curious, and connected in conversation

LEAP IN is designed to be used in a wide range of real-world situations — including when people are being blunt, defensive, or emotionally charged. The skills you’re learning here — listening, empathising, asking questions, and responding from shared values — can help keep dialogue open and respectful, even when conversations become challenging.

An important note: In this quiz, we are looking for the best of the alternatives given. Some responses might be reasonable things to say, but one choice is usually the most skillful option for that moment in the conversation. Focus on whether the response reflects good LEAP IN communication skills — rather than whether you personally agree with it. For example, if an answer begins with “I can see that we both value…” remember it’s attempting to use a communication skill (naming shared values), even if you don’t personally share that view.

Context:

At a family gathering, the TV is on in the background playing a live debate show. A guest on the panel argues that more needs to be done to stop migrants crossing the English Channel illegally in small boats, describing the situation as “out of control.” Your uncle, who supports a tough approach to immigration, nods and says:“He’s right. We have to do something about all these illegal immigrants. It is out of control! There are tens of thousands of crossings every year. We don't know who these migrants are, where they come from or what their values are.

PART 1

Your uncle is concerned about illegal immigration, and he starts by saying the situation is“out of control”. Based on LEAP IN skills, which response is the best example of listening, empathising  and paraphrasing?

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A. “Where’s the evidence that the number of illegal immigrants is out of control? From what I’ve read, the numbers are actually lower than most people think.”

B. “You’re worried that too many people are coming in illegally and that the situation feels out of control. It sounds like you’re concerned because we don’t know who these illegal migrants are or if they share our values.”

C. “So you’re saying we should shut our borders completely to stop them?”

D. “But isn’t most illegal immigration actually from people overstaying visas, not crossing the Channel?”


Not quite. Answer B is best.

This response paraphrases and acknowledges his concern (“you’re worried… out of control”), which shows active listening and empathy without judgment. It mirrors his words to confirm understanding. All the other choices either challenge or argue (“Where’s the evidence?”), which would likely put him on the defensive. By contrast, B signals, “I hear you,” helping him feel understood. When people feel heard, they are usually more open to continuing the conversation calmly.


Correct - Answer B is best.

This response paraphrases and acknowledges his concern (“you’re worried… out of control”), which shows active listening and empathy without judgment. It mirrors his words to confirm understanding. All the other choices either challenge or argue (“Where’s the evidence?”), which would likely put him on the defensive. By contrast, B signals, “I hear you,” helping him feel understood. When people feel heard, they are usually more open to continuing the conversation calmly.


Not quite. Answer B is best.

This response paraphrases and acknowledges his concern (“you’re worried… out of control”), which shows active listening and empathy without judgment. It mirrors his words to confirm understanding. All the other choices either challenge or argue (“Where’s the evidence?”), which would likely put him on the defensive. By contrast, B signals, “I hear you,” helping him feel understood. When people feel heard, they are usually more open to continuing the conversation calmly.


Not quite. Answer B is best.

This response paraphrases and acknowledges his concern (“you’re worried… out of control”), which shows active listening and empathy without judgment. It mirrors his words to confirm understanding. All the other choices either challenge or argue (“Where’s the evidence?”), which would likely put him on the defensive. By contrast, B signals, “I hear you,” helping him feel understood. When people feel heard, they are usually more open to continuing the conversation calmly.

PART 2

Your uncle continues: “Exactly. From what I’ve seen, a lot of the people coming over  have their own belief system - and that’s fair enough, but it clearly doesn’t match up with ours and they don’t do enough to integrate into the Western worldview. Multiculturalism only works if you have a well managed system. People need to be vetted - otherwise, it’s a huge security risk.”

You’ve been listening so far. What is the best open question to ask now?

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A. “I hear that you’re concerned about national security. I also really care about keeping everyone who lives here safe. What is it about small boat crossings that concerns you as a security risk?”

B. “The idea that migrants don’t integrate is a harmful stereotype. Aren’t you aware that politicians and the media are fuelling this narrative for a reason? They don’t have anyone’s best interests at heart except their own.”

C. “I get that you’re concerned about security - I understand that - but can’t you think about what it is actually like for the person experiencing it? How would you feel if you lived in a war-torn country - one that, by the way, is only war-torn because of Western intervention - and you had to risk your life to move away from your home and get somewhere safe, only to be treated like some terrible criminal?”

D. “Don’t you know that the UK takes fewer refugees per capita than loads of European countries? They are like 17th in the rankings. And small-boat arrivals are a tiny share of overall migration. Maybe the idea that we’re being ‘overrun’ is exaggerated.”


Correct - Answer A is best.

First, you start by demonstrating again that you’re listening and that you empathise with his perspective. Then, you ask an open-ended question, without any criticism or judgement. This signals to your uncle that it is safe for him to share more of his perspective with you and invites him to explain his deeper concerns.  Once he feels heard, you can later share your own perspective more effectively and look for shared values (for example, wanting fairness or safety for both migrants and UK citizens).


Not quite. Answer A is best.

First, you start by demonstrating again that you’re listening and that you empathise with his perspective. Then, you ask an open-ended question, without any criticism or judgement. This signals to your uncle that it is safe for him to share more of his perspective with you and invites him to explain his deeper concerns.  Once he feels heard, you can later share your own perspective more effectively and look for shared values (for example, wanting fairness or safety for both migrants and UK citizens).


Not quite. Answer A is best.

First, you start by demonstrating again that you’re listening and that you empathise with his perspective. Then, you ask an open-ended question, without any criticism or judgement. This signals to your uncle that it is safe for him to share more of his perspective with you and invites him to explain his deeper concerns.  Once he feels heard, you can later share your own perspective more effectively and look for shared values (for example, wanting fairness or safety for both migrants and UK citizens).


Not quite. Answer A is best.

First, you start by demonstrating again that you’re listening and that you empathise with his perspective. Then, you ask an open-ended question, without any criticism or judgement. This signals to your uncle that it is safe for him to share more of his perspective with you and invites him to explain his deeper concerns.  Once he feels heard, you can later share your own perspective more effectively and look for shared values (for example, wanting fairness or safety for both migrants and UK citizens).

PART 3

You’ve listened, empathised, asked, and paraphrased — now it’s time to practice offering your input, making sure you use I-statements and name your shared values.

You start to respond. Which of these is the best first statement to name where you agree?

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A. “I hear your concerns, but I just don’t think that small boat crossings  represent the greatest security risk our country faces. What about the rise of the far right? I heard that hate crimes against some migrant communities have seen a huge increase because of all of the fear-mongering by the media and politicians.”

B. “I just don’t understand why you’re so focused on this specific issue? Obviously I care about the safety of everyone living here - but I can’t help but wonder if there’s an underlying reason you’re so focused on migrant communities?”

C. “I come at this as someone who values immigration deeply. Migrants keep our NHS, farms and hospitality sector running, and I think the hostility towards them has gone too far.”

D. “It sounds like we both really care about making our country as safe as possible for everyone living here.”


Not quite. Answer D is best.

This statement names a shared concern — that you both care about making the country as safe as possible for all people. Starting with agreement shows respect and builds rapport. It communicates: “We share common values." Options A–C fail to follow the Name step of LEAP IN because they jump straight into stating facts or argumentation. By contrast, D begins with connection rather than correction. It helps your uncle feel heard and sets a constructive tone for the rest of the discussion.


Not quite. Answer D is best.

This statement names a shared concern — that you both care about making the country as safe as possible for all people. Starting with agreement shows respect and builds rapport. It communicates: “We share common values." Options A–C fail to follow the Name step of LEAP IN because they jump straight into stating facts or argumentation. By contrast, D begins with connection rather than correction. It helps your uncle feel heard and sets a constructive tone for the rest of the discussion.


Not quite. Answer D is best.

This statement names a shared concern — that you both care about making the country as safe as possible for all people. Starting with agreement shows respect and builds rapport. It communicates: “We share common values." Options A–C fail to follow the Name step of LEAP IN because they jump straight into stating facts or argumentation. By contrast, D begins with connection rather than correction. It helps your uncle feel heard and sets a constructive tone for the rest of the discussion.


Correct - Answer D is best.

This statement names a shared concern — that you both care about making the country as safe as possible for all people. Starting with agreement shows respect and builds rapport. It communicates: “We share common values." Options A–C fail to follow the Name step of LEAP IN because they jump straight into stating facts or argumentation. By contrast, D begins with connection rather than correction. It helps your uncle feel heard and sets a constructive tone for the rest of the discussion.

PART 4

Having named your shared values, now it’s time to offer your input, making sure you use I-statements and that you ground what you say in the shared values you have identified.

Which is the best way to do that respectfully?

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A. “Introducing tougher measures on small boats won’t actually solve anything. We’ve spent hundreds of millions on extra border patrols, and people are still crossing — even dying trying to get here. It’s throwing money at something that clearly doesn’t work instead of fixing the asylum process.”

B. “I think the anti-immigrant attitude in this country is completely misguided. I mean, nobody complains about Americans or Australians coming here. It’s obvious the outrage is really about certain types of people. It’s racism, pure and simple. If you really cared about Britain, you’d acknowledge how much immigrants contribute instead of worrying about the tiny percentage of people who might pose a risk.”

C. “From what you’ve shared, I can understand that there are real challenges that emerge when we have people arriving here and we don’t know their criminal history. I can see why that would be a security risk. For me, the other challenge that comes from this issue is how migrants are spoken about by some parts of the media and some politicians. I have friends who no longer feel safe walking the streets - they’re scared they’re going to be attacked because of how they look, and that’s deeply concerning to me. It would be great if we could find a way to discuss this issue nationally without risking harm to minority communities in the process.”

D. “Data shows that net migration figures have risen in recent years, but most of that is from people coming legally for work or study. When you put it into perspective, the number of people arriving on small boats is so small that it really doesn’t present much of a problem.”


Not quite - Answer C is best.

C models the key skills of this stage - sharing your input using I-statements and naming your shared values. It begins by recognising the other person’s valid concern about safety (“I can understand there are real challenges…”) before offering a personal reflection rooted in fairness, security, and compassion. By mentioning friends affected by the issue, it brings sincerity and emotional depth without blaming or lecturing. This approach helps you to build genuine connection with your uncle, showing where your values align and framing the issue of security as something you both care about and could try to tackle together.


Not quite. Answer C is best.

C models the key skills of this stage - sharing your input using I-statements and naming your shared values. It begins by recognising the other person’s valid concern about safety (“I can understand there are real challenges…”) before offering a personal reflection rooted in fairness, security, and compassion. By mentioning friends affected by the issue, it brings sincerity and emotional depth without blaming or lecturing. This approach helps you to build genuine connection with your uncle, showing where your values align and framing the issue of security as something you both care about and could try to tackle together.


Correct - Answer C is best.

C models the key skills of this stage - sharing your input using I-statements and naming your shared values. It begins by recognising the other person’s valid concern about safety (“I can understand there are real challenges…”) before offering a personal reflection rooted in fairness, security, and compassion. By mentioning friends affected by the issue, it brings sincerity and emotional depth without blaming or lecturing. This approach helps you to build genuine connection with your uncle, showing where your values align and framing the issue of security as something you both care about and could try to tackle together.


Not quite. Answer C is best.

C models the key skills of this stage - sharing your input using I-statements and naming your shared values. It begins by recognising the other person’s valid concern about safety (“I can understand there are real challenges…”) before offering a personal reflection rooted in fairness, security, and compassion. By mentioning friends affected by the issue, it brings sincerity and emotional depth without blaming or lecturing. This approach helps you to build genuine connection with your uncle, showing where your values align and framing the issue of security as something you both care about and could try to tackle together.

PART 5

Your uncle frowns and says:
“I get what you’re saying, I really do — and I’m sorry to hear your friends don’t feel safe. No one should feel that way in this country. But you have to understand why people are angry. It’s not just about a few boats — it’s about everything that comes with it. We’ve got record migration numbers, the asylum system is costing billions, and meanwhile people here can’t get housing or NHS appointments. We’re told there’s no money for services, but somehow there’s money for hotels. There’s also a sense that our values — fairness, law and order, even free speech — are eroding, and that the government isn’t being honest with us. When people see chaos at the border, it feels like a symbol of a country that’s lost control. If we don’t get a grip, the extremists on all sides will keep exploiting that anger.

There’s also a real fear that our borders aren’t secure and that we don’t actually know who’s coming in. In a world where terrorism and organised crime are real threats, people want to feel safe — and they don’t trust that the system is protecting them. On top of that, there’s a sense that British values — fairness, law and order, even free speech — are being undermined, while some political elites seem more concerned about looking compassionate than about keeping the country safe. For a lot of people, the small boats have become a symbol of a deeper problem: a government that’s lost control, and a West that’s losing confidence in itself. If we don’t get a grip soon, the extremists on all sides will keep exploiting that fear and resentment.”

What is your best response now to offer your perspective, applying LEAP IN?

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A. “I just think we’re focusing on the wrong end of the problem. We’ve got thousands of refugees waiting years for a decision, and yes we’re spending billions on hotels. But if the government actually processed claims efficiently and made legal routes clear, we wouldn’t be spending so much and people wouldn’t need to risk taking small boats.”

B. “I hear you. You’re saying people’s frustration isn’t just about the boats — it’s about fairness, safety, and being able to trust that the system actually works. For me, the question is how we restore a sense of order while still protecting the people who are genuinely at risk — both refugees and the minority groups here who often get caught in the backlash.”

C. “I think a lot of these fears are exaggerated. Most people coming here are just trying to work or reunite with their family. The problem is the media — they’ve created this moral panic that’s completely out of step with reality.”

D. “This is why I can’t stand talking about immigration anymore. It’s all emotion and no facts. We’re letting paranoia dictate policy instead of compassion. We need to get back to being a country that helps people in need, not one that turns them away.”


Not quite. Answer B is best.

B begins with genuine empathy (“I hear you”) and shows that you’ve really understood what’s driving your uncle’s concerns — not just frustration about small boats, but deeper worries about fairness, safety, trust, and national values. It acknowledges that sense of order and security as legitimate, rather than dismissing it. This makes B a model of how to LEAP IN by staying values-based, curious, and solution-oriented.


Correct - Answer B is best.

B begins with genuine empathy (“I hear you”) and shows that you’ve really understood what’s driving your uncle’s concerns — not just frustration about small boats, but deeper worries about fairness, safety, trust, and national values. It acknowledges that sense of order and security as legitimate, rather than dismissing it. This makes B a model of how to LEAP IN by staying values-based, curious, and solution-oriented.


Not quite. Answer B is best.

B begins with genuine empathy (“I hear you”) and shows that you’ve really understood what’s driving your uncle’s concerns — not just frustration about small boats, but deeper worries about fairness, safety, trust, and national values. It acknowledges that sense of order and security as legitimate, rather than dismissing it. This makes B a model of how to LEAP IN by staying values-based, curious, and solution-oriented.


Not quite. Answer B is best.

B begins with genuine empathy (“I hear you”) and shows that you’ve really understood what’s driving your uncle’s concerns — not just frustration about small boats, but deeper worries about fairness, safety, trust, and national values. It acknowledges that sense of order and security as legitimate, rather than dismissing it. This makes B a model of how to LEAP IN by staying values-based, curious, and solution-oriented.

Listen

Give the speaker your full, undivided attention. Don’t interrupt or jump in with counter-arguments.

Emphasize

Acknowledge the other person’s feelings or point of view, even if you don’t agree. Say something that shows you understand how they feel.

Ask

Invite the other person to explain more. Use open-ended questions to learn what’s really on their mind.

ParaPhrase

After they speak, repeat back in your own words what you heard, to check understanding.

Input

When it’s your turn to speak, frame your thoughts in terms of your own experience and feelings, not as a judgment on the other person.

Name

Find and state something you both agree on. This might be a shared value, a mutual concern, or a common goal.

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